This afternoon at the Rec Sports Complex, the UGA men's ultimate frisbee team ran out of marker cones during the dump swing drill. Jojah, a team that started the year with more than 90 cones, has lost about 80 cones throughout the season."Where are the freakin' cones? I thought we had, like, a million of them," exclaimed 4th year Matthew Bailey, in the middle of the drill. Bailey was "shocked" when he saw team captain Robert Herrig having to take away one of the end zones in order to set up the dump swing drill.
"It's not like the cones can walk away, they don't have legs," said rookie Fletcher Hartline, one of Jojah's defensive players. Fletcher suspects that a stack of our cones were taken by mistake.
To get more information about the Cone Dilemma, we sat down with Brian Walter. Here is the transcription of the interview :
JojahBlog: "Brian, who's responsibility is it to make sure Jojah keeps all of its gear from practice to practice?"
Brian Walter: "Since I have been on the team, it has always been on the rookies to keep up with the disc bag [the disc bag contains both frisbees and cones]. It's not a tough thing to do. Just after every practice, you pick up cones and get all the discs. It's pretty simple."
JB: "Have there been any changes this year with that routine?"
BW: "A little. We now leave a set of cones on the field for the D team, who practice after us. Before we leave the fields, we ask them for a set of cones in return. It's pretty important that we ask them before we leave every practice."
JB: "Where did all of those cones go, Brian?"
BW: "I have no idea, but when we find the guy who took them all, I envision something like that Mel Gibson movie Payback? Yeah, they got it comin' to them"
JB: "Brian, do you have anything to say to the person who stole all of the cones?"
BW: "Na man, I don't have much to say 'bout that."
JB: "Internet sensation Chatroulette: Contender or Pretender?"
BW: "Pretender, weak sauce."
Later in the practice, JojahBlog coverage was able to talk with the Underdawgs [UGA D Team], a suspect in the Jojah Cone case. Nick Hussein, Underdawgs coach, said the following :
"We started the year out with like 6 sets of cones. We now have 3 sets. The B team must have a lot of sets [of cones]."
Our interview with Nick Hussein didn't provide any leads, as we know the B team can't have our cones because they practice right beside us; however, Hussein was able to draw a sketch of a man he saw near our disc bag last week. He said he thought it was Hooten with sunglasses on, but then realized the "guy was like 40 years old."
"If we can't keep track of our cones, how do we expect to be a good team? [slamming a water bottle on the ground] We're running for every cone that is missing" said Peter Dempsey, a Jojah captain, in the team huddle. Coach Kevin Terry and Travis Smith, fresh off their first tournament wins as coaches, declined to comment about the missing cones because they were "shocked to think a team couldn't keep track of the cones."
Since the news of the Cone Dilemma has come out, Cameron Macke was elected Chief Cone Manager. Macke will now be in charge of the Cone Investigation and will be acting as the keeper of the cones. Macke has also been given unlimited resources to get to the bottom of the Cone Dilemma.
"Cam approached me about the position, telling me the theories he had behind the missing cones, which honestly seemed legit," said 4th year David Benkeser. "If there is anybody that will find these cones, it's going to be Cameron."
Macke was unavailable for interview, citing he had "a bunch of math homework and a lab due tomorrow." He was last seen getting in the car with fellow rookie, Nathan Kelly, discussing the use of the team camera as surveillance, buying blue cones for our team and seeing which teams/people end up with them, and Nate's hair.
If you have any information about the location of these cones, please contact Cameron Macke.
